


The Fear of Not Trying (fic and podfic)

by sophinisba, twtd



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Audio Format: MP3, Audio Format: Streaming, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Introspection, Podfic, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Collaboration, Podfic Cover Art, Podfic Length: 0-10 Minutes, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:00:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28410561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophinisba/pseuds/sophinisba, https://archiveofourown.org/users/twtd/pseuds/twtd
Summary: Maybe it was a mistake to try to bring Tony back.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9
Collections: Voiceteam 2020: Team Red, Voiceteam Mystery Box 2020, podfIDIC: Seed 3





	The Fear of Not Trying (fic and podfic)

**Author's Note:**

> Made by Team Red Out Loud for the Audio Garden Challenge at Voiceteam Mystery Box 2020.
> 
> Written by twtd, based on PodfIDIC [Seed 3](https://podfidic.dreamwidth.org/2289.html).
> 
> Read aloud by sophinisba, with audio editing by LittleRedRobinHood.
> 
> Cover by silverandblue.

| 

## Streaming Audio

## Download

  * [MP3](https://f002.backblazeb2.com/file/podfic2020/The+Fear+of+Not+Trying.mp3) | **Size:** 2 MB | **Duration:** 3:23 minutes

  
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Peter sat by the lake and let the last battle against Thanos flash through his mind, the coppery smell of blood and alien ichor, the crashes and booms, the frantic fear as he flew through the air trying to get closer, trying to get the gauntlet away, trying to do anything at all to help. In the end, it hadn't been enough. They had won, but it hadn't been enough. Now, he couldn't sleep. He was haunted by everything they could have done, should have done, anything at all that would make Tony not dead. One minute he had been on Titan and then chaos as they all stepped through the portal to Earth. 

Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe it was a mistake to try to bring Tony back. But Tony would have done it for him. Tony had done it for him. There was no other choice. 

Peter pulled his Starkpad out of his bag, running his fingers over the screen. The screen lit up in response. Peter swiped it open and looked down at the equations that covered the screen. They were Tony's equations. The ones he had used to reverse time and get the infinity stones. The numbers and symbols were soothing, and he tried to immerse himself in the familiar expressions. 

What if he failed though? The what-ifs kept running through Peter's mind. What if Pepper was right, and it was just better to let go? To mourn Tony like everyone else and stop obsessing over ways to bring him back. But what if Peter was right? What if he could find a way to bring Tony back? To reverse time again and save Tony's life? But saving Tony's life… what if they lost because Peter couldn't bear to let Tony go? Dr. Strange said he only saw one end where they were successful. Maybe Peter could bring Tony back, but Thanos would win. Tony's life… was it worth that? He knew what absolutely everyone else would say, but he couldn't shake it. Tony wasn't supposed to be dead. He wasn't supposed to be gone. 

Peter turned off the screen of his Starkpad. No, he decided, he had to try. It was the best thing to do. It was what Tony would do. And even if no one else supported him, he would do it. 

He tucked his Starkpad back into his backpack and stood up. It was time.


End file.
